2014 RSI Invitational |
RSI 2010. Such great memories. |
I don't know why Radio City never wanted to hire me. It could be my height or weight or turns or kicks or any number of things they will likely never tell me. An awesome former Rockette said one of the nicest things to me when I was dealing with this last year. She said the job requires you to blend and not to stand out. She suggested that maybe those who don't fit the mold are too unique, individual, and beautiful to blend. That has stuck with me and actually makes perfect sense as every job has a "type" they look for. You can't be perfect for everything.
After making it through the 2012 Rockette audition. |
Me in the December 2014 issue of Dance Spirit |
For me, dancing has and always will be synonymous to breathing. Nothing will change that. I have traveled the world doing what I love, performed on many stages and trained at an advanced level with some incredible teachers. I have realized dance dreams I never knew were possible. It is a privilege to be able to do this and I've worked my butt off to get here. I won’t let the fact that I haven’t checked one goal off the list undermine others that I have. I don't want to be defined as the girl who gave up any semblance of a "normal life" for a dream she failed to achieve. Recent performance jobs have lead me to truly believe that I have already achieved the dream; I get paid to do what I love. I am also finding the value in a tiny bit of normalcy.
All I ever do is dance. Once a dancer always a dancer, no matter what. One of the first things you learn when entering this industry is that rejection is inevitable unless you’re one of a rare few. You have to use these heartbreaking moments to make you a stronger dancer and person. You keep going if it is what you truly want as only the strong survive.
This fall I will be making another major dream come true. I will be dancing in The Merry Widow, directed and choreographed by Susan Stroman. The audition was two days long and the most fun I had had in a long time. We did high kicks, jump splits, and cartwheels. I will be dancing in the style that I have trained so hard at while wearing some super glamorous costumes. I'm beyond excited to begin rehearsals with this amazing company. I have chills just thinking about performing in such a beautiful place.
I wrote this post for myself and anyone who may sometimes feel discouraged by their big dreams. Life will likely not happen the way you mapped it out, but I believe more than anything that you should follow the path that makes you feel most alive and fulfilled. You will only regret the chances you never take. Best of luck to all auditioning this week!